Contrary to what many people believe— eating disorders are not a choice. On the outside, they may seem like a superficial problem, something that a person can control, but from the perspective of the person suffering from it, it is not. 

​

      Eating is something humans do regularly. It’s a basic human necessity, parallel to drinking water or living under a roof. Consuming nutrition is a need for survival, something many do without a second thought. Why would it be so hard for some people? Why do disorders like Anorexia and Bulimia exist, and why are they so dangerous?

​

      To begin, let’s start at the diet level. Diet culture is a fairly common thing in our society, and many people tend to turn to diet and exercise for weight loss or to 'get fit'. In these diets, there are often restrictions on certain food groups, carbs and fats in particular. Willpower is a word frequently used to describe a person's accomplishment, and many complain about their lack of. 

​

       It may not seem like it, but a relationship with food can be a very fragile thing. To imagine an Eating Disorder, replace the word 'willpower' with 'habit.' In the beginning stages of Anorexia, for example, an individual starts to restrict their diet, similar to what you'd see in a diet. As the disorder progresses, however, the comparison stops. As people restrict more and more, the feeling of hunger is replaced with 'go eat' to 'good'. Emptiness isn't a bad thing, rather, a good feeling. A feeling of self-worth-- a feeling of I didn't eat, therefore I will lose weight fast. Eating Disorders warp perceptions of themselves. As stated before, Eating Disorders aren't a choice: they change the mind, create unhealthy habits of restricting and/or binging/purging and convince people to believe what they see in a mirror is what everyone sees them as. The littlest of fat on the thighs are exaggerated and seen as a ton. 

​

      Food becomes a thing to control. Calories are counted, in and out. Exercise becomes about burning and burning and burning more calories. It's no longer a casual stroll: go faster, go harder, burn more. The whole perspective of life becomes centered around one thing: food. Calorie counting becomes second nature; knowing everything's calculation by just looking at it is a new normal. Out, in. In, out. Food, food, food.

 

    To put yourself in perspective [trigger warning], imagine this. 

 

    You run four miles and then eat two slices of an apple. 

 

    You should have run two more, you useless, pathetic pig.

 

    You start avoiding going out with your friends. 

 

    It’s lonely, but it’s less to worry about.

 

    You’d rather get rid of all the fat in your body work out anyway.

 

    It becomes a routine, and an easy one to follow.

 

    Missing breakfast turns into missing lunch and snacks and dinner and dessert.

 

    Running a mile turns into running four and then five and then six seven eight.

 

    Your mind tells you to run more, so you listen to it. It tells you to eat less, so you listen to it.

 

    You learn to ignore your stomach entirely. 

 

    You are not hungry.

 

    Eating Disorders are obsessive. They are uncontrollable, and once a person slips, it's hard to get back up. Eating Disorders are dangerous. They can kill you. Statistically, 20% of people who suffer from anorexia will die from it. Eating Disorders are not a choice. They are diseases, crawling in a mind, ready to take control. They are deadly, not quirky little trends, and need to be treated as such. 

​

​